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At the start of another new year many of you will be setting the traditional New Year’s resolutions only to find that after not too long these have fallen by the wayside.

I have never been keen to start anything new or remotely challenging on 1st January as I inevitably don’t feel at my best after partying into the small hours! However the end of the year always has me reflecting on the past 12 months and imagining what the next year will bring.

The word resolution comes from the word resolve or to re-solve or to solve again. Many people get into a pattern of re-solving old problems and then not re-solving them because they then turn the process into an event, a static event. Rather than re-solving old problems this year, perhaps it would be more beneficial setting a new direction both professionally and personally, essentially investing in yourself. In the same way as an aircraft makes constant small adjustments in order to keep going in the same direction, so it is also okay for you to make adjustments to your course. Too many people focus on the goal and forget to enjoy the journey.

Take a few moments now to close your eyes and imagine yourself in 12 months and that 2011 has been your best year yet. Really see, hear and feel how good that is. Notice what has happened to make it such an amazing year. What are you doing differently? Who are you with? Turn up the colours and the sounds and enrich those good feelings.

Now notice one small thing that you can do in the next few minutes that will set you on the right direction to really live this year. Do it. Remember to enjoy the journey as this may bring opportunities that you had never imagined possible.

Wishing you a truly amazing 2011.

At this time of year, in the hectic run up to Christmas, it seems that many people seem to lose sight of the Season of Goodwill. It is important to remember your values and to do your best to live by them. A person who lives by their values will find that all aspects of their life line up in a way which is completely congruent, enabling them to feel content and happy.

This metaphor always reminds me of how important it is to prioritise values:

When things in your life seem almost too much to handle, when 24 hours in a day are not enough, remember the mayonnaise jar and the 2 glasses of wine...

A professor stood before his philosophy class and had some items in front of him. When the class began, wordlessly, he picked up a very large and empty mayonnaise jar and proceeded to fill it with golf balls.

He then asked the students if the jar was full. They agreed that it was.

The professor then picked up a box of pebbles and poured them into the jar. He shook the jar lightly. The pebbles rolled into the open areas between the golf balls.

He then asked the students again if the jar was full. They agreed it was.

The professor next picked up a box of sand and poured it into the jar. Of course, the sand filled up everything else.

He asked once more if the jar was full. The students responded with a unanimous "yes."

The professor then produced two glasses of wine from under the table and poured the entire contents into the jar, effectively filling the empty space between the sand.

The students laughed.

"Now," said the professor, as the laughter subsided, "I want you to recognise that this jar represents your life. The golf balls are the important things; your family, your children, your health, your friends, and your favourite passions; things that if everything else was lost and only they remained, your life would still be full.

The pebbles are the other things that matter like your job, your House, and your car.

The sand is everything else; the small stuff.

If you put the sand into the jar first,” he continued, "there is no room for the pebbles or the golf balls.

The same goes for life. If you spend all of your time and energy on the small stuff, you will never have room for the things that are important to you. Pay attention to the things that are critical to your happiness. Play with your children. Take time to get medical checkups.

Take your partner out to dinner. Play another 18. There will always be time to clean the house and fix the disposal. Take care of the golf balls first; the things that really matter. Set your priorities. The rest is just sand."

One of the students raised her hand and inquired what the wine represented.

The professor smiled. "I'm glad you asked. It just goes to show you that no matter how full your life may seem, there's always room for a couple of glasses of wine with a friend."

Hoping that you all find space for your glass of wine,

Season's Greetings

Jo

The person you are to become will learn from the things you do right now. The image you have of yourself in the future depends on the actions you see yourself taking today.

A very important person is watching your every action, listening to your every word, and knows your every thought. That person is you.

Imagine yourself a year from now, looking back on today. Imagine your future self being exceedingly thankful for the way you lived this day.

Then step forward and live today with that in mind. Think, speak and act in such a way that the person you will become inherits many positive benefits from the person you are right now.

Confidence, integrity, strength and effectiveness do not simply appear out of nowhere. They are built by the way you live your life.

And now is your opportunity to live in a powerful, positive way that will benefit your life for a long time to come. Now is your chance to make your future self thankful for the empowering paths you choose to take.

I was recently asked to step into someone else's shoes to do some training. Holding onto the remnants of an old belief that I do not match up to others who are more experienced, I felt that the shoes were very big. Luckily my passion for my own collection of shoes kept me grounded and wearing my new, best pair of heels I went out and was just me; the best me in my best shoes.

The feedback was awesome and the lesson learned even better. My shoes are the ones that fit me best, especially my best ones.

Be the best self you can.

Phobias are one of the most rewarding things to cure, since the individual has quite literally been frozen by fear, often for many years.

On a recent NLP training, one delegate’s fear of mice and rats was so extreme that she has been unable to look at the recent Weetabix TV advert or indeed any other pictures of small, furry, tailed creatures. The initial trigger had been a small mouse, which had run between her legs as she was coming down stairs aged 4. The mouse was probably more scared than she was! Since then, her anxiety levels have increased over the years as her brain replayed the encounter with the mouse in full technicolour, over and over again, magnifying the fear out of all proportion. Even the mention of a mouse this week had her pale and clammy, with pins and needles in her hands, and ready to run out of the room.

Enter Billy, the rather large pet rat.

Even the sight of his cage at the doorway 30 feet away had her shaking and he was rapidly removed from the room. She re-ran a movie of the initial phobia-inducing incident backwards in her mind repeatedly until it became amusing. About 20 minutes later Billy re-entered the room and was gradually allowed closer and closer. Soon curiosity got the better of the delegate, who peered inside the cage and admitted Billy was rather cute. And within another few minutes, she was giving him a cuddle. They remained new best friends for the afternoon; Billy was not allowed to leave her side and she spent the tea break feeding him biscuits.

That evening, when at home watching TV with her family, she discovered that the featured creature in the Weetabix advert was in fact a hamster!